Christmas is two days away, and I’m very excited about it. 🙂 We have most of our Christmas presents completed and wrapped… we handmade about half the presents this year. We’re heading out to my dad’s house in Conroe early tomorrow morning. We’re hoping to be on the road by 5:30am. We have to leave that early because we have to travel while the baby is sleeping. She doesn’t take kindly to being stuck in her carseat for long periods of time. We’re also taking Sarah and Logan in our car, and it’s better if Logan sleeps during the journey as well. Long car journeys are painful for small kids.

And Matt didn’t have to go to work today! I’m so happy when he stays home. He and the Munch went to the post office and then are picking up McDs for breakfast on the way home. *sigh* I love Christmas. And did I mention my husband has off today? And Monday as well. 🙂

I had such a hard day today. I don’t know what my problem is… although it could be the nine cookies I ate with a caffeinated drink (tea), and then the subsequent crash. The baby was just…. just…. ah, I just couldn’t take her today.

But that’s just it, isn’t it? Even on my “off” days, I still have a baby to care for, to love — a baby that requires patience. There’s no vacation when you have an infant; you don’t even get to call in sick.

Matt took her when he got home from work. They went off to the post office and then to Target to get a magenta ink cartridge. I have about two hours to myself. Two blissful hours. Two heavenly, blissful hours. Do you hear that? Silence. Lovely silence. Shhh… listen again. It sounds so peaceful. And no baby clinging to my leg asking for her every need to be met by me.

It’s funny — even though I’m so happy to have this time to myself, I still miss her when she’s gone. Being a mom is a quirky thing.

Well, before I do an entry about today, I really should finish the story from last entry. Matt got out of bed while I was up writing my entry, and then we stayed up for about two more hours and worked things out. I am still special. 🙂 I hope our marriage never falls over into such a mundane routine that we are no longer special to each other. We’ve been married four and a half years — and we even have an infant now — but our marriage is still warm and loving.

The baby is sick. Oh the pain! And I don’t mean hers. She cries and cries and there is nothing I can do to comfort her because she is crying about how she doesn’t feel good. My head feels like it’s going to burst! My little sad sweetie is sleeping right now. Hopefully her little body will fight off some of the sickness and she’ll feel better when she wakes up. She’s been sick since Sunday. I think Matt and I are coming down with it now. It starts in the throat (like a lot of colds do).

I want to do a scrapbook of her first year, but I’ve never scrapbooked before. I talked to Deb about it since she has a lot more experience than I do. I think I’m going to go up there for a couple of days at the first of the year and learn from the master.

I’m making another calendar for the family for Christmas. I like these calendars. They’re fun to make and fun to have all year.

Merry Christmas. 🙂

It’s 2:30am and I can’t go to sleep because I’m really angry at Matt right now. We got into a fight tonight, and, once upon a time, he would not be able to go to sleep until our fight had been resolved. But right now, he’s fast asleep. What does that say about our relationship? What has happened in the last few years that he can now go to sleep even though we are in the middle of a fight?

I guess I used to feel special, and now that life has fallen into the routine and mundane, I don’t. It makes me really sad.

I’ve had a very strange few days. My friend Glenn died four days ago in a car accident. He was 34-years-old, married with two young children. The youngest, Josh, is the same age as Lily. He was born three days after Lily.

Glenn is going to be missed so badly by so many people. And it’s just weird that he’s gone. It’s just…. weird. I just always expected him to be around. And then out of nowhere *poof!* he’s gone.

It wasn’t fair. I never thought I would say that. I have always thought that was a silly thing to say. But there it is. It wasn’t fair. He was so young and so good and so alive. And it’s not fair to his children.

My life has been on hold for four days as I have tried to come to terms with the change in my world. His funeral was today. A funeral always brings closure. And for the first time in four days, I feel like doing things again.

Goodbye, Glenn. I’ll see you on the other side, and it’ll be really nice to see you again.